Can I quit now?

I don't think I want to be a women. Not that I want to be a man. Not that's that not cool. Just too much elbow skin and privilege for me to handle.

I just don't know. It seems such hard work. I just don't care enough to DO everything.
I like sleep. Like lots.

I mean we don't look at a dog or cat (you might be cat people) and and think, wow. She is so out of shape. They can drag their belly across the floor and it's totally cool.

I just don't want to spend three hours a day, every day to look "more woman".
I like make-up. I just seemed to miss something important because I don't understand when being an angry orange became a "thing". I used to be pale and interesting and now I am just pale. When did being a person with something important to say become less important than lip contouring?
I feel like I am channel Bill Hicks half of the time. More like Bill Hicks with a head cold and tequila hangover.  
I hate my sister. I wish I didn't. I spend a lot of time meditating and drawing on my deep spiritual connection to all that is to cleanse this hate while also hoping she gets hit by lightening. In the vagina.
She is all the shit about "people" in a human flesh sack. She is cruel and petty and shallow and vain and fake.
She "woman's" well.
She is high heels and fake eyelashes and doesn't eat.
I don't even know who the fuck she is competing with. I just can't.
I have a lot of young people in my life now and it makes me feel so, fucking, old.
Where as ten years ago I might have tried to warn them about the crazy shitty obvious shit they are doing, I know they are doing to do it no matter what the fuck I say!
"I just got my degree! I'm going to do this cooperate thing (that has nothing to do with anything I am remotely interested in) and it's going to be great".
No. No it's not. You will hate it with the passion of a thousand suns and if you do it long enough you may even jump off a fucking bridge. Is nothing like what I say!
"Oh. Hope it works out."
I do. I mean I hope it isn't the hell I have seen about 15-20 of my friends go through from fast food chains to casinos, where they waste the whole of their twenties doing shit they fucking hate for companies that are evil until they lose it in some epic fashion.
There is not enough camomile tea in the world to get rid of the nightmares I can see coming and I can do jack and shit about.
I'm just going to go back to my vegan pie making and read Pintrest uplifting quotes so I can get through the day.

37

So I don't really know what happened.
I feel like I had one of those coughing fits where you have to try really hard not to pee, and BAM!
I went from 27 to 37.
All kinds of shit happened I wasn't prepared for. For the most part I was cool with, except for ass hair.
I am not a particularly hairy person, so I got kind of lazy with it until I walk by a mirror naked and think I have a hipster comic coffee nerd staring back at me from there.
I'm sorry. What?
No one told me, "Hey, it's tough being a woman but one day your ass will be a man."
It is hard though.
When I was younger all I wanted was people to listen to my ideas and stop objectifying me. Now if someone notices me enough to objectify me I am having a good tits day.
You know. I good tits day?
When your one decent bra is on and not trying to murder you like your a vampire from Buffy and it seems like those perky little twins that got you served alcohol really quickly are kind of bloated from retaining water to fill the sad gap.
You know how after babies your boobs change from oranges to pears, well that leaves a sad gap.
I have been married a long time.
I has it's benefits.
The socks, OMG the socks, are really, really good.
Men's socks are like feet hugs and moss that has been watered the the tears of virgin wood nymphs.
Women's socks are thin. You can still feel every bump in the pavement like you are reading foot Braille or something. Thinner than make-up counter smiles.
I had dreams.
Some of which came true.
But I have really fucked up dreams.
Being 37 and married and a Mum and I feel like I am supposed to be contented or some shit and I am just pissed off. Although I could just be hangry.
I spent so much of my life waiting. Waiting for other people, waiting for my time, waiting to be heard, and it was all a fucking con.
It was all this society joke. If you do all of these thing, THEN we will take you seriously.
I am a nerd, and also a spiritual person and both groups don't get the other group importance to my life. I am down with it.
I just have a bonus on religion checks as I am levelling a triple class character druid/bard/barbarian.
Or as my daughter calls it Bardbarian druish.
Having a +2 handle animal helps with being in comic and geek store.
Guys, what is that smell?
It's like a horde of billy goats who rolled in tiger shit ran through the shop, a week ago. I know my breasts clearly stop my brain from working but it doesn't effect my nose!